Husband & Wife SMS

Husband: raja dasaharath ki 3 raniya thi
wife: to
husband: mein 2 shadi aur kar sakta hu
wife: soch lo draupadi ke 5 pati thaiy.


Patni: Kaash tum aise SMS hote jise
Main Zindagi bhar save karke rakhti!
Pati: Air kaash tum
aisi ringtone hoti jise
main har hafte badal sakta.


Husband wife se: Ye kya tum ek aur suit le ayi?
Abi parso hi to..
wife chilla kar boli: Kya kaha!!
Kya parso?
Bolo …
Kya kha tumne?
Kya parso, parso kya, bolo jaldi!!
Batao kya parso?
Husband: Kuch nai,
main bas ye keh rha tha
ke parso bhi ek hi suit layi thi,
aaj 2 le aati.


Biwi aur saali main kon zyada achi hoti hai?
Answer: Saali behtar hai.
Kaash woh biwi ke bagair mil sakti.


Marriage Broker: Tumhe kaisi biwi chahiye?
Man: Mujhe chand jaisi biwi chahiye,
jo raat ko aaye aur subha chali jaye!


Wife: Agar main mar jaun to tum kya karoge?
Husband: Shayad main mar jaunga.
Wife: Kyon?
Husband: Kabhi kabhi zyada kushi janleva hoti hai.


A beggar- ‘Oh sundari ! Andha hoon.
Sawa paanch rupya de de..
“Husband said 2 his wife- De de, tujhe
sundari bola hai to har haal mein andha hai…”


Husband wife ki godh mein leta hua thaa.
Wife: Kaisa lag raha hai ji?
Husband: Aise jaise Bhagwan Vishnu
shesh naag ki Godh mein lete hon.


Ek aadmi apni biwi ka antim sanskar karke ghar ja raha tha.
Achanak bijli chamki, badal garje,
jor se barish start ho gayi.
Dukhi aadmi: Lagta hai pahunch gay!


Husband apni Wife se (suhagraat ko):
Darling apna chand sa chehra to dikaho...
Chehra dekte hi husband bola:
Arey tumhare chehre par to kale dhabbe or gadde hai,
tumhare maa baap ne mujhe dhoka diya hai.
Wife: Darlin nayi khojo se chand ka yahi roop samne aaya hai.


Wife: Main galti se khane ke saath rumal bhi kha gai
Husband: Konu baat nahi, apna bachcha aayega to "pagdi" pehan ke aayega!